Stories Along The Way (September)
These sections will be mostly my journey updates. Eventually, I will add a whole section just for stories people have shared with me through this website.
September 1
This is the first new month since the update. Closing out August with links to all the other months went perfectly! Now I will just have to remember to add every new month links, to all the previous months :D there is a better way to organize the blog section, I just havent found it yet ;)
Today, someone I assume was American, stopped and asked me for directions. Did he ever pick the right person for that!! I gave him a dishcloth with the website's email so he could ask if he needed further direction. No news is good news. But. If he happens to also visit the site, I definitely spent my afternoon praying for him. The feeling of being lost in a whole other country is not easy. I don't know if he was a truck driver or regular traveler but that feeling is the same no matter how similar the two countries are.
One time, I pulled up to a shampoo shipper in Chicago on a Friday night at midnight. Your experience of the US changes drastically when traveling for leisure vs. work as an AZ truck driver. It was near a downtown area and as I drove along, all I could think was "don't nobody pull out a gun or get in to a brawl, ok?" I was worried about leaving the shipper at all and nearly parked right there until the bar crowd was home and in bed. But. I handled it fearlessly and told myself, whatever happens, happens. It was fine. But that night, it was probably only fine because of God.
The company I worked for was determined to treat men and women exactly the same and that was not smart of them to do. They put me in several very dangerous situations and eventually, I let both my FAST Card and passport expire so no one could send me to the US anymore. People can see the woman driver. People notice the woman driver that looks like she belongs on a runway, not behind the wheel. There were several times I had some of the most absolutely, incredible, astounding, compassionate help from Americans when I was out there too though. The US is not all downtown Chicago on a Friday night!
Being lost in any country is not pleasant. Ever. Churches almost never name drivers as a group of people they pray for. Nobody really cares that much about drivers, even though, drivers give up everything for your comforts. Though I expect that person was a regular motorist, he was still driving something today.
He had to really get my attention too! Cause I was deeply lost in my mad dash to knit to the point I did on the blanket and still have time to make dishcloths.
I started the second colour today. Just past 2 squares in length. I will definitely, definitely run out of the thicker yarn. Maybe won't even get half way. We'll see though. If I do only a couple rows a day, it will take me a year or more to complete the blanket. But. I'll be able to start using it, even as I knit it if I have to. That said, there is a strong probability this blanket will not end up being my own cause God may show up for me sooner than I think.
When I first started the website, I spoke of potentially mailing dishcloths to Americans in one section with no idea why I was even saying that. And today, God brought an American right directly to me! How amazing is God?! That amazing!!
(New Blanket page, has now been created!!!)
September 2
Well. I guess this one colour of yarn for a dishcloth was 2 different dye lots... good thing I didn't notice that until I was taking the picture!! Now it's too late and it's a completed dishcloth so it is staying like that! Hopefully no one who hates me ends up with it, cause then they'll hate me even more or think I did it on purpose. Nope. Just couldn't see the colour difference until it was way past too late. I wish I could be malicious, but actually; no I don't cause then I'd be just like everyone who has hurt me and my entire life would have been a waste... but. If I didn't have God's grace, I can see how easy it would have been to be malicious all my life and been fine with it. It must be as God intended it, or I'd have noticed before I finished. But. To whoever ends up with that dishcloth; don't be afraid to email me for a new one if one colour fades.
Updated the New Blanket section today also. Knit my hands to the core though and actually cannot knit even one more stitch today 🫠🫠
They will be better with a few days rest, or at least better breaks. I really pushed hard to get to the point I did on the New Blanket and still make 2 dishcloths. Well done today :D
A few serious storms are brewing for just about all of North America. Be safe in the coming weeks and months, wherever you are. Thinking especially of anyone along any coast, and folks in or passing through Tornado Alley- especially drivers. You cannot hear the tornado sirens in a truck if there's hail... ask me how I know that 🫣...
It would be a very good investment to install tornado warning siren lights along the highways. That way if the sirens are wailing, the lights are flashing too and they couldn't just be a stationary light; they'd have to be flashing so that drivers don't think it's someone's porch light or something. But. In Canada, we don't even have sirens, we have an alert system that goes to people's phones... you know, the thing they don't want you reading or touching while you're driving.... 🤣🤣 it works though. Sort of.
September 3-4
Busy days these last 2. Last night, the internet cut out on me as I was updating the blanket, so I couldn't even post those pictures until the am. I knitted one dishcloth today, but I haven't snapped the picture yet. No work on the blanket at all today though, but I did gather all the other yarn I can use for this blanket- some might end up dishcloths cause it may yet be thin enough. I have one batch of dishcloth yarn left at all, and it will have to be improvised because it's nearly lace-thin. Then, I will have only the yarns set aside as Christmas yarns. The clock is ticking on this Christmas special now!!! So exciting!!!
The yarn depletion will not end Donations for Dishcloths. As soon as I have more yarn again, I will knit more dishcloths. However, I will focus on the Christmas thing first, until that yarn is gone too (about 30-40 quite large balls are set aside). The time for more yarn is not quite here yet, but- it's not far. I know a few people have asked if I need more yarn yet. I can only take small quantities at a time too, because I still need room to sleep in my car and every night in order to sleep, I already move several bags, back and forth between the bedding area to the passenger seat. The bins the yarn was in, are now holding clothes at a friends place. Plus winter clothes will take up more space in the car than the summer clothes do. I am happy to accept more yarn though. I suspect I could easily have a trailer full in a matter of days if I asked. I appreciate the people who want to offload their yarn, ever so very much!
I will likely be ready for more yarn somewhere between October-Christmas :)
My hands desperately needed a break from knitting though, apart from the few hours when I focucsed on finishing today's dishcloth, I haven't knit more than 10 minutes at a time today and didn' even touch the blanket.
There is a day coming in my near future that I am going to do almost nothing but sleep and rest. As soon as it's cool enough for a day like that, I will have an all-day rest day, as long as my body lets me (neck injury usually prevents me from resting too long all at once). Though I look forward to a cloudy day below 25 degrees, it's bittersweet because that also means it'll be crunch time preparing for the winter and as much as I can't stand gross sweaty hotter than hot humid grossness; it is way easier to be homeless in the warmer weather than in the winter.
For now, it's still summer. Hallelujah! And pray God makes miracles bigger than I can even think of before it's winter again.
September 5
Today I ready myself for more malice, more bad news.
*it was not what I thought, though what I thought could come any day now....
Had to face some serious disappointment in my heart regarding God though. I have not worked through it yet and am still fighting tears. Something else that only God can heal now.
September 6
The news I waited on and cried over and shook my faith over yesterday, was not the news that came. Thank God for that.
If I am really lucky, I'll recieve from God before anyone has a chance to do any more damage to me.
Though I did talk myself through it, my crisis of faith had me in tears most of the afternoon, a bit in to the evening and I still had to fight tears through the day. Even if there should ever come a day where God decides he doesn't love me (which will never happen, no matter how much people try to convince me of that), nobody can stop me from loving Him. Ever.
September 7
The first version of this post was lengthy. Even though it was not a bad post, I scrapped the first one and started over.
Instead I'll just point out: my faith = back on track :D
Thank you God for showing again, how much you really do love me. Come quickly. I need you, every faithful person that exists, needs you.
September 8-9
Busy couple days again. No blanket today, not quite 2 dishcloths knitted but no pictures yet and going to sleep with a dead car battery; parked in a way that my car will be hard to boost.
Not much to say except that God loves me and will turn this around with miracles bigger than the suffering. Better than I can ask or imagine.
This time the dead battery was my own fault though. I could hear it needed to run longer but I didn't take it for a drive, then when I came back 2 hours later; no start. I can't just waste fuel either though...
Sigh.
More than I can ask or imagine....
September 10
Oh goodness. What a long and trying day this has been. But. Nearly everything that needed to get done, got done and then some. Starting with getting rescued with a boost.
I did get the lifeline installed on the New Blanket. I did not get an entire dishcloth done today. I did get the pictures taken of the last few days of dishcloths though.
I will get a lot of knitting done tomorrow though, God willing. For tonight; rest.
September 11
Today someone gave me a huge box of food that was safe to eat and several balls of yarn. I hesitate to take this kind of stuff because of the risk of people using my situation or the website for their own purpose or gain but I do think this was someone who wanted to help. I have been given things people have tried to curse, by people who cared about me and though I believe God is far ahead of that curve and laughs at that sort of thing, I am homeless, I have lost everything that made me, me and I am already only inches away from disappearing entirely.
To be on the side of caution:
"Dear God,
Thank you so very much for the generosity I recieved today. Please bless all that came to me and all I will use it for, in nourishment and art. Please keep me always clear-headed enough to know when I should or shouldn't accept things from people and if I don't get it right, please allow my heart with your Grace to make it clean as I use it. Please help me heal any broken energy that might be there. From what I was told, it sounds like this person also has significant pain in this case and still has a heart big enough to help take care of someone she has never met. Please help her heal too, that she may one day knit again if she wants to and if not, please help keep her path gentle and pure. Help the people around her to remember that chronic pain changes people and compassion must win every day so she keeps her support around her without fail. Thank you God, for all You do and will do, in the lives of everyone You know on a personal level. Thank you for some other things I can't talk about openly to strangers, You know what I am thinking of. And thank you for every step that comes in turning this around, I know it won't be long now. God, please lift these gifts in the meantime and cover both our hearts in doing so. I am so incredibly sorry for every time anyone gave me anything (regardless of the intention) and I didn't ask for your blessing on it.
I love you God <3
In Jesus' name I pray, Amen."
Also, today I did not end up getting any further on the New Blanket due to yarn and car organizing, though several of the balls of yarn I got today, can be used for the New Blanket and the lifeline was installed yesterday so now I can get right back to knitting. I did finish the dishcloth I couldn't quite get done yesterday and 2 more today, one dishcloth was one of the newest balls of yarn already! Going to bed with empty needles for dishcloths, which I almost never do. ... but not an empty belly!!!!! 😁
September 12
Today has been a whirlwind of a day.
There is so much to pray about and some of it, is better if I don't say to the whole world but I must stop and pray before I finish this second dishcloth today!
"Dear God,
Thank you for the gifts I have given and which have been given to me as well today. Thank you for every blessing that comes. Please keep me safe in all things, prayer and doing. As well as please keep all gifts given or recieved, in truth and light with no opportunity for slight. I lift this to you and ask you to cover it with your approval.
Please bring healing to those who need healing, if it is your will. Please shine love for those who feel unnoticed. Please keep wheels safely turning for divers, in your care.
Whenever I have conversations, please help keep my words well in line with your perfect word in our broken world, especially since everyone started pushing the agenda that WW3 is a spiritual one.
'Glory to God from generation to generation, in the church and in Christ Jesus, forever and ever'
With God's help, I can. In God's time, He will. In His truth, we're safe.
Amen."
CHEERS to the woman who discreetly saved me embarrassment today too!!! Thank you!
September 13
I had dishcloths that matched some folks shirts today so I gave them a dishcloth!!
As I was knitting the blanket today, I was thinking of the woman that gave me most of the yarn for the New Blanket. I can't make it to this week's coffee, but I can be there next week. I hope all is well for the folks at coffee <3 <3 I pray for you all often. The prayers I post here, are by no means the only thing I pray about. See you all soon!
I knitted my favourite dishcloth so far today too. The yarn was so soft and easy to work with and the pattern it made, turned out very sharp looking. :D
September 14-15
Mostly unremarkable couple days and right now, neck is in too much pain to even think of anything else. Was it carrying knitting bags? Colder weather? Sitting too long in ways my neck didn't like? The fact that I am homeless and all of my neck care upkeep stuff is gone? All of the above?
I haven't lost mobility except for moving slower so far. Hopefully I get a handle on this ASAP. It's not the worst it could be but it's bad enough. Will be a long winter ahead. The colder weather has a huge impact on pain levels.
I did still manage 2 dishcloths and to work on the New Blanket a bit though. Determination.
September 16
Pain in neck is better but not fine today still. Hopefully by tomorrow it will be back to normal pain (my zero is more like a 4 or 5). Got 2 dishcloths and some more New Blanket knit today!!
... I wasn't going to write about it, but here goes anyway...
Today, I went to go pray and ended up crying to God instead. I tried hard, several times to stop the tears. They kept happening anyway... then I had this thought that came complete with imagery; I pictured every tear, staining satan's soul with a concience. I imagined God throwing my bottles of tears at evil, singeing them with God. Except then I remembered, evil loves God too. Feeling the stain of my tears like holy water on their consciences is probably the closest the devil will ever get to God, ever again.
I know folks call me the one who is evil. They'll see what God has to say about that one day....
For a few minutes I thought, from now on whenever I cry, I want my tears to stain evil with a conscience. Then I realized, that is exactly why God doesn't want us to think for ourselves or fight evil ourselves. Cause we're just not smart enough. Can you imagine how much more the sour people would make me cry if they thought it was hurting evil, or how much more evil would make me cry just to mock me for that? Lol- it's a good thing to trust God ahead of ourselves.
And who knows, maybe it was God who sent me the original thought in the first place. It sure stopped me from crying today! And that is a win.
September 17
What a day!
I have so much to talk about today!!
God shone through so very much today!!! 2 minutes would have been the difference of giving a dishcloth to someone, that's how impeccable God's timing was today!
My car wouldn't start, and right after my rescuer rescued me, there was someone else pulling in with a car on a tow truck!! I knew I had a dishcloth to give and believed it was for my own rescue, but nope, it was to lift someone else's heart.
A few hours later, a crash so bad I could feel the anger in other drivers out on the highway- luckily I was parked safely, but a lot of people had a really, really bad day out on the highway today.
As I was leaving the grocery store from getting food, this guy with a utility trailer in his pick up truck went down the street, having just about the best day of his life; bringing home his garage update and I caught his joy as he passed by me in the opposite direction, taking his corner nice and slow so his wrapped up new garage storage would be safe!! I was so happy for him, even though it is not normal for someone who has been robbed of everything, to share that kind of joy. I was though. I am still happy for him. I bet he thinks no one shared his joy, but someone did. He must have felt like a millionaire in that moment!!
And. It was in that moment that I decided both capitalism and socialism are depicted as despised by God in the bible. The only money handling God does like, is prosperity in faith. Therefore; I have decided I am now a prosperitist. Even though I had to make the word up. I believe in faith that produces so much fish, your boat tips. I believe in God being gracious to whomever he wants to. I know God has plans to prosper me.
I always knew the fight between capitalism and socialism was redundant, even arrogant and definitely causes immeasurable cruelty to people who don't deserve it while rewarding all the wrong things that the bible warns about.
As for knitting, I might not get any further on the New Blanket today because my neck is just too sore. I did get 2 dishcloths done, but no pictures yet. Probably going to wait until tomorrow for the pictures.
But what a day!!
Thank you God!!
He did so much more than just what I mentioned here too <3 <3 God is really, really awesome <3 <3
September 18
No cell phone reception tonight and it took all I had to get the pictures posted so not much to talk about today, though someone did offer to buy the blanket tonight <3 <3 that was pretty cool.
September 19
Interesting day today....
Right now, I'm so tired I could fall asleep writing this. As soon as my head hits the pillow though....
I had one point in the day where I very easily could have given a dishcloth to some folks with car trouble and I didn't. Not sure why. Was it a test from God to see if I am giving the dishcloths by his will or mine? Maybe. Those kinds of tests, God does do.
Then my own car died and I had to get another boost from my rescuer. Thank God he keeps coming out to rescue me.
The New Blanket and pictures got interrupted by a car that won't start so pictures might have to wait until tomorrow. Neck pain is improved today though- so that's good.
September 20
Paused working on the New Blanket for this update and today's dishcloth pictures. Mostly an uneventful day- though difficult to get through. The yarn for one of the dishcloths today, is a type of yarn I swore I'd never use for anything again!! It is a really difficult yarn to work with so my tension levels were on high alert, all day long. Now that I have moved on to the New Blanket, I am grateful. I put a bunch of really hard to work with yarns in to this batch too. That is not the last one like that, and even the almost jean-looking yarn is really hard to work with too. I am glad I am finally putting these yarns to use, but if I never see another ball of yarn that is purposely frayed, it will still be too soon!!